Recently, I began to dig into the genealogy of my mother's side of the family. Precisely, I was wanting to learn about my grandmother's side of the family. Generally speaking the tendency is to gravitate to learning about our father's side of the family, at least this has been my own experience for a myriad of reasons. In part, I think it is a cultural thing, where the convention is being more interested in the male progeny. Learning about our family fulfills our strongest need, belonging, and re-enforces our sense of identity.
Being Father's Day today, I began to think about this. I had to conclude without our mother's we'd not have our fathers, and I can't help but think about my father, without thinking about my mother, and visa-verse, when these parental celebratory days come around every year. The fact is, many women perform the role of both mum and dad, which was my family situation having an absentee father at the age of 13.
Many of us loose fathers to death at an early age, or are children without parents. I feel the need to talk about this on this Father's Day. We often overlook the darker side of these parental, so called, celebrations doesn't exist, and are left as an implicit, unspoken agenda, expectation and pressure to happily go long with the crowd, smiling and sending sentimental messages on social media etc. The reality is that for many, it is a painful time with overwhelming feelings of great loss. I certainly am not opposed to these 'days', it's just something I think society in general needs to be sensitive to.
My late father had been a police officer. When the death's of the three R.C.M.P. were recently taken, Const. Doug Larched, Const. Dave Ross, and Const. Fabrice Gevaudan, I began to think about my father, when he was as a Police officer. If he'd been killed in the line of duty, which could have very easily happened, I would not be here. I'd never been born.
I am so grateful for having had my father for so many years.
Especially poignant to me right now, is the tragic and violent deaths of the three Moncton R.C.M.P. Officers, who's young lives were taken, leaving young children, wives, mother's, fathers, sister's and brothers, devastating to the families and to those who loved them.
My thoughts and prayers go out to all on this Father's Day.
|Const. Douglas Larched, Const. Dave Ross , Const. Fabrice Georges Gevaudan|