Cutting Through Depression - Chris Gethard

Chris Gethard's new one-man show, Career Suicide, finds a humourous way to tackle dark topics like suicide, depression and alcoholism. (Atisha Paulson)

Having a dark or a good sense of humour comes from pain I believe. Joni Mitchell's song People's Parties said that laughing and crying are the same release. But if we had our druthers most of us rather laugh than cry.

I used humour growing up, as a coping mechanism, to cope with alcoholism, mental illness, Multiple Sclerosis and death. Using humour to cope with what I call a big, dark, emotional, shit ball, it helped a lot, and sometimes I think might be dead otherwise under the heavy weight of that shit ball I carried around, didn't want to talk about and really didn't want anyone to know about.

When my young,handsome, intelligent, sensitive, creative and funny, and loving husband died at the age of 27, I thought he'd committed suicide, because in retrospect he'd appeared to have all the signs. I really had great difficulty explaining it all to myself, until I came to terms, begun to understand  and accept how he'd suffered for 14 years with drug induced Paranoid Schizophrenia, and Brittle Diabetes, and this is what eventually took his life.

Those with depression, who find themselves at that jumping off point, where the pain of living, is for them greater than the pain of dying, are mentally ill and not thinking right. And no, it is not a cowardly thing to do. There is so much stigma, misconception and assumption around mental illness, that most times this simply exacerbates an already difficult situation, making it worse.

Loved ones are left trying to make some kind of sense of why this suicide has happened. They wonder if there was something they could of done to prevent it from happening. The 'if only' and 'what if' rational is a useless exercise because illness happens, and loved ones don't cause, control, or can't cure any disease.

Because of a recent suicide in our small community, my thoughts have been about, how so many young people are suffering from depression, mental illness and are contemplating suicide or who have followed through. There is a serious epidemic throughout our country and there is simply not enough help, and little to no preventative help available either.

Listening to comedian Chris Gethard's interview yesterday affirms that humour can help to cut through depression and lift the veil of darkness and stigma that openly invites a dialogue through their humour.

When we laugh we feel better, no doubt due to how this effects our endorphins, dopamine, and serotonin, all feel good hormones.

I love comedians, and truth is, I'd love to do stand-up but I know couldn't do it for a profession, I'd be too stressed and anxious. But I understand why people do it, they use humor to cope and love making others laugh. There may be a connection between mental health problems and comedy with many pros and cons to being a comedian, but Stand-Up For Mental Health is definitely a positive.

How To Save Yourself From Yourself

I was never a good student from grade three on. I succinctly remember how school changed for me, beginning with bad teachers, boring classes and once I hit puberty, it all went from bad to worse. Lots of problems at home caused emotional turmoil within my young self. Art and creativity was a kind of therapeutic refuge, helping me cope with melancholy, and depression.

Depression did overwhelm me a few times, and I once had suicidal thoughts. I am grateful I didn't suffer from serious mental illness, though it was in my family, along with alcoholism. I was also affected by the disease of multiple sclerosis, that my brother contracted at sixteen, when I was six years old.

In 1981 I was married to the love of my life, whom I'd lost to paranoid schizophrenia, and brittle diabetics at the age of 27. Bill, was 26 when he died, and we'd been married only four months. This was the lowest point in my life, but I can also say, it was a time when I excelled creatively. After Bill died, my own disease of alcoholism took a downward spiral as the years passed, until finally through the Grace of God I got into recovery, almost 21 years ago.

The worst thing about disease, whatever it might be, is the denial we can all experience. Most of society does not want to talk about disease, particularly mental illness of any kind, whether it be mild depression, an ongoing clinical depression, or other serious disorders.

 I've heard it said, that denial, and the refusal to openly accept mental illness or disease, can be worse than the illness itself. I would think the reason being is, that it prevents the individual from getting any help and support, that they so need. This is why I feel so strongly about talking honestly, and openly about this topic, because you never know who's life you might save, perhaps even your own.

It has been absolutely vital for me to educate myself, so as to be able to cope with mental illness, and other kinds of illnesses.

There is a significant difference between melancholy, clinical depression, and mental illness. It is impossible to be happy all the time, and really, who would want to be? If we weren't unhappy we'd never know or appreciate happiness. But when you are suffering from serious illness, we need to seek help, and others need to educate themselves, reach out, and help us, help ourselves.

There can be no room for shame or judgement in illness of any kind, and we all need to make a concerted effort to be accepting, and proactive. We also need to advocate and organize for change, and save ourselves from ourselves, by coming out of our denial, and move toward acceptance.